Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Plum sucking in the city of lights

Things are different here in France. And by 'things,' I mean fruit.

I have just finished my morning snack (doesn't everyone eat 10 times a day?) and feel compelled to tell you about it. Despite clear warnings from blogophobes that they really don't care what a narcissist eats for breakfast.

Yellow plums are currently in season, yet I am sorely out of practice after spending three weeks in the US. Fruiting in France does not come as naturally as you might imagine. The stuff here is juicy. With the first desk-side bite I managed to dribble at least half a pint of yellow liquid into my lap. Yes, there. And yes, white skirt. But you know what? It didn't matter. So good.

I approached the second plum with more trepidation. After making a tiny incision with my teeth, I managed to suck most of the juice from the plum, leaving a withered bag of skin and pulp. Budding naturalists and readers of Annie Dillard's Pilgrim at Tinker Creek will recognize this as the giant water bug's approach to draining a frog.

I then went out and bought a sack of peaches and cherries for further experimentation.

This is the first time I have posted about fruit on this blog, but I warn you, dear reader, it will not be the last.

Nor will it be the last time that I blatently try to attract readers who are keyword searching for porn.

Welcome to the blog!


Anonymous said...

As I found out, France is plum paradise. Are you acquainted with the wonderful mirabelles and reine-claude? The most exquisite types of plum. The season for these starts in late august. You're invited to join me at Joinville market when the time comes to acquire these fruit miracles. Miammmmm...

Le Meg said...

Stop it with your filthy pornography, PN.

thebeardedpig said...

Dearest freedomlover,
As I sit here ın chains in Guantanamo Bay,my saliva runs down my bearded chın like the spring of eternal hope. The hope of sınkıng my rotten teeth (when I fınally get it past my wee tusks)into your juicy plums soothes even a de-caped captn freedom. This hog slosh they serve us here isn't even fit for a man! Truth be told, I also liked the part about the white skirt. I found this site by searching on the prison guard's ınternet connection. (She's crazy about pigs in the sack). I was searching for white skirt fetishes. As one is free to do!
Blessed are the freedomlovers, blaguese! Bonne continuatıon! as my truffle-hunting relatives might say.